[ A short while later, she's calls him back. She's sitting in her office at work, with no one else around. It sounds serious and despite his reassurance, she feels nervous. ]
[ Jesse is at Ashe's place, looking just the slightest bit frazzled. Not having sex wouldn't be the end of the world or anything, even if it's a prospect he does not enjoy. And he has a feeling Ashe won't take very kindly to the thought either. But it's for the best, right? ]
Hey Ashe, so... long story short here, I had a talk with somebody on the network about my condition. Y'know. The wolf thing.
[ He gestures vaguely at his face, which looks entirely un-wolf-like in that moment. ]
And it turns out that there might be another way to transmit this from person to person, other than a bite.
[ She purses her lips, listening, and trying to figure out what exactly that might mean. Transmitting this between people, other than a bite. This is Deerington, that could mean just about anything. It doesn't immediately pop out to her what that could mean. ]
Okay, so you're tryin' to tell me that you're afraid you'll make someone else a werewolf in another way? The only way I have ever heard about was through a bite and only when you are transformed, so what are you gettin' at?
[ There, the band-aid has been ripped off. But being faced with the prospect of returning to celibacy now that he and Ashe have finallystarted sleeping together means he doesn't look even a little bit relieved about it. ]
[ Jesse grimaces a little, but his expression is set in a way she'll no doubt recognize as his particular brand of determination and stubbornness. Yup, not a joke. And he's made a decision about it already to boot. ]
[ The frustration isn't hidden, and she rubs her face with her hands. ]
Lemme get this straight. You're suggestin' we stop havin' sex, on the off chance that someone from another world is right about werewolf STDs? And you don't intend to let me have a say in the matter?
Not since this happened we haven’t! You think I like this any better than you?
[ It’s actually good that she’s not in the room with him right now, because between these enhanced senses and the weird sense of possessiveness he’s been getting hit with lately, he isn’t sure he’d be able to keep his resolve if she tried, even a little, to break it. ]
I’m sorry, but this is the way it’s got to be. At least until we can figure out if it’s true or not some other way.
No, I'm sure you don't like it, but you're the one puttin' your foot down, instead of havin' a conversation with me. This is about us, and you gotta stop makin' all the decisions ahead of time! I deserve a say.
[ She stares at him, a mixture of feelings bubbling inside of her. She's pissed for sure, but she's also kind of scared, because now that she has that intimacy with him, the last thing she wants is to lose it. ]
And I say, no. I'd rather be a werewolf with you, if it means givin' it up.
[ This is going far beyond where he thought it would, and she's right. He's doing the exact thing that he always hated being done to him.
But he can't. When faced with the prospect of her going through this, the loss of agency and uncertainty... he just can't. ]
You're right. I know you do. I should give you a say.
[ He looks away for a moment, expression tight and pained before he looks back at her. ]
But I can't let you throw away your humanity just for this. I'm mighty flattered you would, but just think about it. You want this for yourself? It's done all sorts of things to me I haven't even told you about. Believe me, you'd hate it.
[ She watches him closely, trying to figure out her thoughts on the matter.
Then he mentions that it's done things to him that he hasn't been upfront about, and she takes a deep breath before lettin' it out. ]
I know that negotiatin' has never been your strong suit, but it's not a conversation if you're still tellin' me what we are goin' to do.
[ Where to start with it all, he has some points...]
I do a lot of things I hate doin' when the benefit outweighs the risk. Many of which have taken my humanity, and what I got left ain't goin' anywhere because I've tried damn hard to get rid of it and it still sticks around holdin' me back from certain things. So that's not a concern. Also, you should be tellin' me these things because because I can't help you if I don't got all the information.
Look Jesse, I've waited years to have sex with you, and I finally get it, and nothin' in this godforsaken place is gonna take that away from me. So if I've gotta become a werewolf to do it, then buy me a dog collar because I'm all in.
I’m fine at negotiatin’, [ He mutters, spoken with the air of a man who knows he doesn’t have the upper-hand in this conversation. She’s right about all of it, and he can’t even be mad at her for it, but he knows he still can’t relent. It’s not a great position to be in, all be told.
Her last admission, at least, has him grinning a little despite it all. ]
You really do know how to stroke a man’s ego. But I can’t, Ashe. If we even try, all I’m gonna be able to think about is how much it’ll hurt the first time you change.
[ Because it had hurt quite a lot. Another thing he hadn’t told her. ]
Let’s look into it. We’ll ask around, we’ll… we’ll figure it out.
Their time together is running through her mind and it's all she can do not to just yell at him. But he won't relent and she wouldn't actually force him, but she's feeling frantic enough to point her finger at the screen. ]
Don't you think for a second I won't tie you to a damn chair and have my way with you! [ But hey, she's been threatening to kill him for years too. It's almost an improvement. She leans back in her chair and runs her fingers through her hair. ]
[ That’s not as much of a threat as she seems to think it is. Two parts of his nature war with one another for a moment: one that enjoys the thought, another that rallies against in any way being contained.
But if she’s his, as his instincts keep insisting, then he’s hers. So in the end, it’s the former part that wins the day, ratcheting up his temperature a few degrees. Not helpful at all for their current state of ‘negotiations.’ But the floodgates are open now, and he could easily imagine the feel of rope at his wrists, Ashe leaning over him with that blood-red smirk…
Oh. He should probably stop staring at her with that intense expression, gaze hungry and a little silver, and say something, shouldn’t he? He blinks quickly, like a man just waking, and clears his throat. ]
[ And if there is one thing Ashe knows in negotiating it's when she's hit the nail on the head in an offer, or as in this case, a threat. Whatever works to get her what she wants.
She knows that look and she's seen it in his eyes a lot recently, and he doesn't have to imagine that blood red smirk because she leans into the device and her drawl as smooth as honey. ]
Oh sweetheart, it wasn't a threat. It was a promise.
[ He's just given her the keys to this whole argument. Another reason to hate this whole werewolf business. As a human, he'd be tempted, but he wouldn't be driven to complete distraction.
But he'll still try to cling to his self-control much as he can. Jesse swallows hard and gives a little shake of his head to clear it. ]
You're playin' dirty, but don't you think that I won't too.
[ She raises a brow at him and goes to tug at the knot of her tie, loosening it. ]
What tricks you got up your sleeve cowboy? Better be good, 'cause I have got moves that you've never seen before. And they are downright filthy. [ She gives him a wink. ]
[ His eyes narrow—though mostly down at her hand and the tie therein, but the expression still holds true to his feelings. As does the quiet, animal-like growl that follows. ]
Don’t make me move this back to text. I’m not budgin’ on this.
[ When he looks back up her face, his stern expression is touched by just the hint of a smirk. ]
And really, darlin’, you’re gonna have some trouble findin’ moves I haven’t seen yet. But lord knows, if we figure out this is all just a false alarm, I’d like to see you try.
[ Her hand doesn't move, it only encouraged by the growl. She undoes the knot before slowly sliding it off and dropping it to the floor. ]
Look, even in the slim chance you could turn me into a wolf by us having sex, I am gonna go out on a limb and guess it can't be transferred through the fluid.
[ And there goes the top button. ] Or do you just find me that irresistible? And you of all people should know I'm always comin' up with somethin' new. I'm real creative. Even if you'd seen it, I'd do it better.
You catchin’ what I’ve got isn’t what I’m thinkin’ about just now. Wouldn’t put it past you to try and use this camera to your advantage here.
[ He’s sure that’s what she’s up to. He’d bet his gun on it all over again. But does that mean he’s about to make good on his threat and change this over to text?
Not… just yet, no. ]
Pretty sure of yourself there. But speakin’ of irresistible, you’re the one wagin’ your humanity on getting my clothes off. So I guess it’s mutual.
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private text -- backdated to mid-December
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Hey. What's up?
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Hey Ashe, so... long story short here, I had a talk with somebody on the network about my condition. Y'know. The wolf thing.
[ He gestures vaguely at his face, which looks entirely un-wolf-like in that moment. ]
And it turns out that there might be another way to transmit this from person to person, other than a bite.
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Okay, so you're tryin' to tell me that you're afraid you'll make someone else a werewolf in another way? The only way I have ever heard about was through a bite and only when you are transformed, so what are you gettin' at?
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[ There, the band-aid has been ripped off. But being faced with the prospect of returning to celibacy now that he and Ashe have finallystarted sleeping together means he doesn't look even a little bit relieved about it. ]
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Then she just starts to laugh without any of the humor. ]
Very funny McCree...
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Wish I was jokin', Ashe.
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Tell me you ain't takin' that little piece of advice with more than a grain of salt.
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Lemme get this straight. You're suggestin' we stop havin' sex, on the off chance that someone from another world is right about werewolf STDs? And you don't intend to let me have a say in the matter?
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[ He’d feel the same way in her position, which is the kicker here. But he’s also too hard-headed to budge now that his mind has been made up. ]
Maybe she’s wrong, but we don’t know that yet. And she’s the only person I’ve talked to who comes from a place with actual werewolves in it.
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You can not be fuckin' serious!
Isn't it too late for that anyway!? I mean, we've been makin' up for lost time.
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[ It’s actually good that she’s not in the room with him right now, because between these enhanced senses and the weird sense of possessiveness he’s been getting hit with lately, he isn’t sure he’d be able to keep his resolve if she tried, even a little, to break it. ]
I’m sorry, but this is the way it’s got to be. At least until we can figure out if it’s true or not some other way.
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[ She stares at him, a mixture of feelings bubbling inside of her. She's pissed for sure, but she's also kind of scared, because now that she has that intimacy with him, the last thing she wants is to lose it. ]
And I say, no. I'd rather be a werewolf with you, if it means givin' it up.
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But he can't. When faced with the prospect of her going through this, the loss of agency and uncertainty... he just can't. ]
You're right. I know you do. I should give you a say.
[ He looks away for a moment, expression tight and pained before he looks back at her. ]
But I can't let you throw away your humanity just for this. I'm mighty flattered you would, but just think about it. You want this for yourself? It's done all sorts of things to me I haven't even told you about. Believe me, you'd hate it.
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Then he mentions that it's done things to him that he hasn't been upfront about, and she takes a deep breath before lettin' it out. ]
I know that negotiatin' has never been your strong suit, but it's not a conversation if you're still tellin' me what we are goin' to do.
[ Where to start with it all, he has some points...]
I do a lot of things I hate doin' when the benefit outweighs the risk. Many of which have taken my humanity, and what I got left ain't goin' anywhere because I've tried damn hard to get rid of it and it still sticks around holdin' me back from certain things. So that's not a concern. Also, you should be tellin' me these things because because I can't help you if I don't got all the information.
Look Jesse, I've waited years to have sex with you, and I finally get it, and nothin' in this godforsaken place is gonna take that away from me. So if I've gotta become a werewolf to do it, then buy me a dog collar because I'm all in.
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Her last admission, at least, has him grinning a little despite it all. ]
You really do know how to stroke a man’s ego. But I can’t, Ashe. If we even try, all I’m gonna be able to think about is how much it’ll hurt the first time you change.
[ Because it had hurt quite a lot. Another thing he hadn’t told her. ]
Let’s look into it. We’ll ask around, we’ll… we’ll figure it out.
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Their time together is running through her mind and it's all she can do not to just yell at him. But he won't relent and she wouldn't actually force him, but she's feeling frantic enough to point her finger at the screen. ]
Don't you think for a second I won't tie you to a damn chair and have my way with you! [ But hey, she's been threatening to kill him for years too. It's almost an improvement. She leans back in her chair and runs her fingers through her hair. ]
So what then? Any thoughts?
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But if she’s his, as his instincts keep insisting, then he’s hers. So in the end, it’s the former part that wins the day, ratcheting up his temperature a few degrees. Not helpful at all for their current state of ‘negotiations.’ But the floodgates are open now, and he could easily imagine the feel of rope at his wrists, Ashe leaning over him with that blood-red smirk…
Oh. He should probably stop staring at her with that intense expression, gaze hungry and a little silver, and say something, shouldn’t he? He blinks quickly, like a man just waking, and clears his throat. ]
I, uh. I don’t take kindly to threats, y’know.
[ Smooth. ]
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She knows that look and she's seen it in his eyes a lot recently, and he doesn't have to imagine that blood red smirk because she leans into the device and her drawl as smooth as honey. ]
Oh sweetheart, it wasn't a threat. It was a promise.
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But he'll still try to cling to his self-control much as he can. Jesse swallows hard and gives a little shake of his head to clear it. ]
You're playin' dirty, but don't you think that I won't too.
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Oh yeah?
[ She raises a brow at him and goes to tug at the knot of her tie, loosening it. ]
What tricks you got up your sleeve cowboy? Better be good, 'cause I have got moves that you've never seen before. And they are downright filthy. [ She gives him a wink. ]
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Don’t make me move this back to text. I’m not budgin’ on this.
[ When he looks back up her face, his stern expression is touched by just the hint of a smirk. ]
And really, darlin’, you’re gonna have some trouble findin’ moves I haven’t seen yet. But lord knows, if we figure out this is all just a false alarm, I’d like to see you try.
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Look, even in the slim chance you could turn me into a wolf by us having sex, I am gonna go out on a limb and guess it can't be transferred through the fluid.
[ And there goes the top button. ] Or do you just find me that irresistible? And you of all people should know I'm always comin' up with somethin' new. I'm real creative. Even if you'd seen it, I'd do it better.
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[ He’s sure that’s what she’s up to. He’d bet his gun on it all over again. But does that mean he’s about to make good on his threat and change this over to text?
Not… just yet, no. ]
Pretty sure of yourself there. But speakin’ of irresistible, you’re the one wagin’ your humanity on getting my clothes off. So I guess it’s mutual.
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